enlightened horsemanship through touch

My friend Pattie Boden hunts with the Oak Ridge Fox Hunt Club and the Farmington Hunt Club near Charlottesville, Va. She owns and operates The Animal Connection, a stylish holistic pet store in Charlottesville. Her knowledge of alternative pet foods always astounds me. I asked her a few months back to tell me about her new-found passion for alternative styles of horsemanship, because she, as I did for so long, lives amongst some of the finest traditional horse people in the world. But often, our ideas have clashed with those around us. For me, it was easier to keep my mouth shut, accept what I needed to learn from those infinitely more experienced than I, and move on. Pattie has found a way to thrive in place, revealing the beauty of personal reinvention found in devoting a different kind of time and attention to her horses.  

What A Lifelong Foxhunter Learned From The Cowboys

Sometimes you start on a journey before your bags are packed. That’s how it’s been with horses. I’d like to say I attended a mind-blowing clinic that changed my life, but it sure didn’t happen that way.

My first exposure to “natural horsemanship” was with a visitor to Virginia from Colorado. I was invited to watch Garth Eichler try to solve some issues with problem horses. I’d ridden in the hunter/jumper field all my life and I really had no idea what he was doing, but what impressed me the most from that first visit is that the horse needed help and he wasn’t about to finish this session until he was able to help this animal. This horse was pretty sure he was in charge of any human in his path and didn’t care who knew it. The Virginia hosts fussed at Garth for not staying on a pretty ambitious schedule, but he felt he needed to stick with this horse for whatever time it took. Even in the pouring rain. As I look back on that now, it was clear that Garth was in it for the horse.

Garth Eichler

I’ve followed foxhounds since my teens and I can tell you it is a pretty dicey deal for horse and rider. (I say followed, because hunters follow the scent of where the fox has been a good while ago – most times the fox is laughing at you.) It’s big energy at these meets and a whole lot to ask of a horse to come off a trailer into a flurry of nervous activity and be expected to stand still and behave nice. You’ve got riders from all walks of life and all levels of expertise (or not) coming together to follow ages old protocol and decidedly fixed trail manners. Some people get good help with good trainers but you do have a lot of people who wing it on a song and a prayer. I think I kinda fell somewhere in the middle.

That year, I bought my buckskin pony, Lightning. She is a saint, albeit an opinionated one. When I first met her, I’d had a pretty shaky couple of years with a “typical chestnut mare” who wasn’t good for my confidence level. So I was more than relieved to find a great caretaker. In turn, I believe she was also relieved to not have to be a school pony for kids anymore and she fell right into life with an adult who was all about fun.

Garth came back to Virginia that spring and I decided to see what this horsemanship thing was all about. It wasn’t easy – in fact, it took me all afternoon to learn how to get Lightning to give me “two eyes” or lead with a soft feel. I was amazed to find I wasn’t the leader after all and she was shocked to even consider that she wasn’t and even tried to kick me a few times for good measure. If you had told me years ago that it would take that kind of time to do these seemingly simple exercises, I would have laughed. Lightning got the one rein stop with no problem, it was her favorite exercise. But to move off when I asked her to (“I mean move off”) was met with resistance. It got better, but I still was just opening the door.

The best thing about that week was getting to know Garth. He’s as honest with his thoughts and his comments really made me think. He was aware of everything…. EVERYTHING. He taught me how to feel what a horse is thinking and doing from the end of a lead rope, to watch a horse’s ears, eyes and body position. If you think that is easy, just try to do this standing a distance in front of your horse without turning around to see. (I’m still working on this one.)

What got my attention was when Garth said the way we approach horses can teach us a lot about how we interact with people. As I was dealing with an alcoholic family member and managing employees in a retail business, that concept was huge. Garth suggested that I offer the right answers and the wrong answers would become difficult for them to select, I can tell you what a difference that has made in my life.

Now that this young horseman had this old foxhunter’s attention, I invited myself to visit Garth and his wife Jill at Devil’s Thumb Ranch in Colorado to see what this was truly all about. The first day, I learned I didn’t know how to lead a horse or tie a knot. At that point, I decided to throw away everything I knew and to start fresh like the rank beginner I was. Garth took me into the corral of trail horses, draft horses and donkeys and this is where I started to learn real herd dynamics. Watching them play, move each other off from food, who hung out with whom was a start. Then we’d halter one and I’d learn to disengage a hindquarter or move a front end to the left or the right. Every horse was so different and I was trying to hard I was exhausted mentally.

But the lightbulb went off when we finally got to trail ride up the mountain. I finally understood how what we did on the ground worked in the saddle. I understood that when you disengage the hindquarters, you have reliable brakes. When you move the front end, you can open gates without kicking your horse. And you could ask your horse to stop and go by changing the energy in your body, you didn’t need crops or spurs! This was pretty neat and the week didn’t last long enough.

Fall came and so did another hunting season. Everyone likes to have their picture taken at Opening Meet, when you are dressed in your finest and your horse is spit polished and braided. All this aside, the photo from that year is my favorite. Last year’s photo I was stiffly posed, reins tight, ready for anything… or so I thought. This year, my body was relaxed, my reins were loose on my horse’s neck, Lightning looked calm and happy… now I was truly ready for anything. I keep my before and after picture side by side, just to remind me to strive for more knowledge.

Lightning and me BEFORE

Lightning and me AFTER

That year was the best year of hunting I can remember. My horse was easier, responsive, relaxed, no worries at all. It was also one of the hardest, because my eyes were opened and I really started noticing potential train wrecks before people even got on their horses. It annoyed me that people were content to ride up behind my horse hoping for a rump to stop them and they wouldn’t take the time to teach their horse how to stop. I wondered why people didn’t realize that the horse understood stroking as a reward and patting was not. (Try this on yourself and see what feels better.) And geez, you should have seen Lightning laugh when my friend got off of her horse to retrieve a lost glove, her horse took off to the barn, and she was waving her crop trying to chase him and get him stopped. Talk about predator and prey!

Since then, I’ve made it my priority to spend as much time with Garth and his wife Jill as time, travel and budget will allow and one day I hope they’ll be proud to call me a horseman. I was honored to be at his ranch and have the opportunity to have a day with their teacher and friend, Tom Mowry. Garth and Tom are like father and son learning from each other. Talk about respect for people and animals. Everyone should be so lucky. I’ve also had time watching other trainers like Bryan Neubert, Buck Brannaman, Martin Black work with people and horses – everyone presents information differently, it’s neat to see what they have to offer.

My “horse family” and I traveled this year to to the Ray Hunt Memorial Weekend in Fort Worth, Texas. Although “horsemanship” taught this way is not new and not restricted to “cowboy riding,” Ray was one of the first who started teaching in weekend clinics and preaching the gospel according to Bill and Tom Dorrance. Over twenty horsemen from all over the country were given an unstarted colt, two hours on two days to work with them, and on the second day, everyone was riding like they’d been on the trail all their lives (some better than some of the seasoned hunt horses I’d seen in Virginia!). It was neat seeing how all these trainers were able to adjust to fit where the horse was in his mind. All had a lot of the same “mental tools” but how they used them were pretty amazing. Most had the horse as a priority in their mind, one or two showboated a little to prove their skills, but they were not judged the winner of the competition either.

Meanwhile, back in Virginia, I was quickly becoming disillusioned with closed minded trainers and riding instructors. Breaking a horse instead of partnering seemed to be the norm. Riding by repetition instead of true feel just didn’t feel right. I just didn’t feel I belonged with the same old groups anymore. That’s where Kevin Freed and Lora Presgrave come in. I’d met them when he hosted Bryan Neubert at his Rockfish Farm, about twenty miles from my house. For some reason, I knew I was supposed to be at their barn. I am really blessed, because now I can ride with like-minded horsemen every day I can get out there. I feel safe with my horse and although riding time is distance limited, the time in the saddle is well spent.

The difference this has made in my now twenty four year old Lightning is unreal. Before she was always okay for a trail ride or competition but she could take it or leave it. She now meets me with a totally different attitude. She gets it that I’ve changed and she really likes it. Her eyes are bright with anticipation and she can’t wait to see what we are going to do from day to day. She is more balanced in her body and the change is amazing.

Although what I am learning helps me daily in my relationship with my horses, I really saw where all this came into play when I started looking for a younger horse. Although I didn’t buy a horse, a trip to an auction with my Colorado friends was one of the best lessons of my life. Arriving the day before the sale, Garth, Jill and Tom taught me how to evaluate a horse. What looked good in a photo, turned out to be a train wreck waiting to happen to an uneducated buyer. Watching how the sellers “prepared” a horse was crazy. We only saw a few horses advertised as “bomb proof” that might have actually been safe to ride. Most probably had big motors, but you wouldn’t have known it because they had their socks ridden off the day before. Talk about buyer-beware.

Next day at the ranch, Garth patiently took the time to help me learn how to evaluate a horse just from approaching his herd. I was overly tentative and didn’t feel I did very well putting what I’d learned into practice, but I learned a whole lot from watching him. Sometimes you can see and understand what the right thing to do, but you just don’t have the feel. I kinda felt like a stick in the mud and it was frustrating because he is so good at what he does and a “good job” from him is one of the best complements ever. You know you have deserved it when you get it. In his mind, though, one of the best complements is when your horse respects you, licks and chews, relaxes and likes being around you instead of their own kind.

I didn’t come home from Colorado with a horse. I’d been looking for one in Virginia a long time. I was pleased to find the right one was in the barn all along where I was boarding Lightning. I never really noticed the chestnut horse called Hank. But thanks to Garth’s teaching, I now knew what to look for. And boy did I start noticing. Hank is a kind sort who likes people and isn’t particularly pushy in the herd. He was used as a guest horse for all levels of riders so he’s adaptable and forgiving. When I asked if I could try him, he was responsive without being too reactive, which made me feel like I could learn a lot and not mess him up in the process. And, I knew his “history” – how he was started (by one of Ray Hunt’s students!), who rides him now and how he has been treated with kindness and respect throughout his twelve years of horse-human relationship. Thanks be to the horse gods who suggested to Kevin that he consider letting me share some time with this great animal.

Here's Hank, my newest ride.

My friend hosting this blog asked me to write about what foxhunters can learn from cowboys. Horsemanship knows no discipline, it’s not Western or English, it’s not cattleworking or foxhunting. Learning to be in partnership with animals is a language all it’s own and knows no boundaries or limitations. People are only limited by what they are willing to learn. And it’s okay, even if you’ve been riding for 40 years, to start fresh and learn something new. I’m looking at my relationships with horses and people in a whole new way these days, thanks to some really great teachers and friends. I’ve got a lot of wet saddle blankets to go before I get there, but the road sure is easier now that I’m headed in the right direction.

All the Best and Happy Trails
Pattie Boden
Owner of Animal Connection in Charlottesville, Va
“The all natural store for dogs, cats and horses”

WENDY MURDOCH, an internationally recognized equestrian author, instructor, and clinician for over 23 years, teaches her students how to do what great riders do naturally. Her desire to understand the function of both horse and human, and her love of teaching capitalizes on the most current learning theories in order to show riders how to exceed their own expectations.

Wendy’s studies include an apprenticeship with Sally Swift, as well as extensive training with Linda Tellington-Jones, Dr. Joyce Harman, Jon Zahourek (Anatomy in Clay), and Dr. Hilary Clayton. To help her guide students toward better function, Wendy became a Guild Certified Feldenkrais Practitioner and continues her study with Dr. Feldenkrais’ first assistant, Mia Segal.

Her fascination with the mind/body connection between horse and rider has led her to explore courses outside the equine world and bring that information to her students. Murdoch writes articles for a wide variety of magazines and is a regular contributor to Eclectic Horseman Magazine. She is the author of Simplify Your Riding and creator of the three-part Ride Like a Natural DVD series. For more information, visit www.murdochmethod.com.

NB: This book is on sale at Horse And Rider Books–10% off regular price of $27.95 until July 16th.

Start or end your riding sessions with Wendy Murdoch’s 5-Minute Fixes, and you’ll be amazed how quickly you can replace old habits with new ones, get out of your riding rut, and transform what you can’t do to what you can do–naturally, capably, comfortably, and consistently alongside a happy riding partner–your horse.

Really nice piece on the maverick godmother of mind-brain investigation, Anna Wise.

Remaining compassionate toward others is an exercise in endurance these days. The Armageddon folks are probably having a field day with the earthquakes, volcanoes, tsunamis and such. There does seem to be a lot going on with Mother Earth. And then there are the personal catastrophes.

Mara and Samsara are cyclical, never-ending. Things are always happening to people. I’ll bet each of us knows someone who has recently suffered some loss, some tragedy, some illness or injury that has changes their lives. And as compassionate, mindful people, we jump to offer comfort, support and maybe even a casserole.

When my daughter became catastrophically ill back in 1996, community support kept me from going over the edge. More than a year of assistance from her school, family friends and neighbors, as well as her father’s work acquaintances buoyed us through the dark days. People gave of their time and hearts to a child and her family in grave danger of death in every way. I am grateful to this day.

When a friend in Virginia finally got her very own horse after 30 years of catch riding and leasing, there was a celebration. She hacked out and showed with well-earned pride and a palpable happiness after so many years. Finally she was able to bond with a horse who was truly hers, and vice versa. It was a match made in heaven. Until suddenly the horse died. She was surrounded by love and support as she worked through the loss and grief.

The thing is, I wonder how it is for her now. She hasn’t gotten a new horse. Many months later, I know she is still grieving. No horse, no equestrian life, still catch-riding. I do not have to wonder how it was for me in the ensuing years after the initial catastrophe with my daughter. It went from dreadful to unimaginably worse, with the added burden of managing it alone.

But as with a string of natural disasters, folks get compassion fatigue. Seeing me exhausted and near the edge of insanity, people would recite to me the (they thought) wise analogy of putting the oxygen mask on yourself before putting it on your child. Then they wandered off to make sure that their golden, healthy children got to soccer practice on time. I didn’t resent them for that, but I did resent the lameness of their unsolicited advice. If they’d taken the time to look (which was awfully hard when protecting themselves from the pain that comes along with compassion overload), they’d have seen that my arms were too tired to lift the oxygen mask.

The initial frenzy of empathy and assistance for Courtney King-Dye has hit its zenith. From personal experience, I envision the downslope. Attention will wander toward personal matters. Because raising your own family, caring for your own horses, doing your own job, are understandably a priority. And then there is the next big disaster. Novelty renews compassion without fatigue.

Let me share with you from my experience this fact: while attention from others wanders, and the initial danger eases, struggle goes on. Reports of Courtney’s continued and seemingly miraculous progress pile up, and we may feel that it’s OK to turn our attention elsewhere. And it is, to a certain degree. Spreading the compassion around never hurts. But remaining mindful of the evolving struggle of others keeps our hearts open.

In six weeks, six months, a year, Courtney King-Dye will still be battling the aftereffects of her accident. If we care, we will be there to help. But but but, you say, humans don’t have that long of an attention span. Sadly, we don’t. Especially when it’s not us that’s the issue. Two years down the road, I could have certainly used a casserole on the rare nights I left my daughter in the hospital for a few hours rest in my own bed and respite from stale sandwiches from a machine. It would have been nice to have some of that early frenzied assistance paced out so that I didn’t have to clean up after dogs who’d been waiting patiently for my return, or find a way to get the grass mowed after a six-week absence. Courtney and her family will face the same dilemmas.

What can we do to remain mindful of her continuing battles? If we don’t know her personally, then the casserole idea is pretty much out, along with offering to mow the grass and walk her dogs, or exercise her horses. But there is an option I can think of, and it’s a simple one. The Courtney King-Dye Medical Fund eBay Store has been very successful. But predictably, numbers are down.

If you have a Twitter or Facebook account, you can easily help by posting about it. The rewards of offering something for sale (service or goods) are great. Watching as your item is bid on is fun, and it feels good to know you will help defray the costs of care that are not covered by insurance. For those in the equestrian/equine business, offering something for sale is excellent PR/advertising. As everyone who is reading this knows, riding horses does not pay. You can also bid on items. The prices are well below retail. Planning ahead for gifts throughout the year will help not only your own awareness of Courtney’s strivings to regain her life, but also of the good fortune of your loved ones.

Currently the store has 12 Troxel Reliance Dressage helmets (that normally retail for $159.95) up for grabs with a minimum bid of only $50. The helmet safety campaign t-shirts are also now available in the store for $22.75. These were designed with a very catchy slogan “Strap One On – Everyone’s Doing It” by single mom and dressage rider Jeri Bryant of CA in order to help support Courtney.

Lendon Gray said yesterday that Courtney is making excellent progress. This is very encouraging, but the road to recovery will be a very long one, with lots of physical therapy and specialized rehab. Run solely by Lyndsey White of SUCCEED for no personal gain, the eBay store aims to hit the $10,000 profit mark before the end of this month. That will go a long way toward helping Courtney in her marathon for recovery.

To contact Lyndsey if you want to offer an item for auction in the eBay store, email Lwhite@freedomhealthllc.com, or call (859) 420-1006. You can also find progress reports on Facebook and Twitter.

Yep. DaVinci, owned by Cheryl Ward of PaintingHorse.com painted a lotus blossom for me, in my new favorite color combination of pink and orange.

Here it is:

Isn’t it fabulous?

The collaboration between horses and humans is not a new phenomenon. In fact, it is one of the factors in the spread of civilization. Now that civilization has spread around the world (a little too effectively??), that collaboration has the luxury of taking more leisurely and creative forms, where the nature of equine intellect can be examined.

I hope to explore this more over the course of my next couple of posts.

A Saturday entertainment brought to you by the folks at Horse Conscious.com, a newsletter with lots of interesting content.

A Horse’s View of the World

Do you ever wonder what your horse is actually thinking? How often have you ever wondered if you are on the same page or even talking the same language? Take a look at some of the definitions from the horse’s dictionary and compare them to yours.

Arena: Place where humans can take the fun out of forward motion.
Bit: Means by which a rider’s every motion is transmitted to the sensitive tissues of the mouth
Bucking: counter-irritant
Crossties: Gymnastic apparatus
Dressage: Process by which some riders can eventually be taught to respect the bit
Fence: Barrier that protects good grazing
Grain: Sole virtue of domestication
Hitching rail: Means by which to test one’s strength
Horse trailer: Mobile cave bear den
Hotwalker: The lesser of two evils
Jump: An opportunity for self-expression
Latch: Type of puzzle
Lungeing: Procedure for keeping a prospective rider at bay
Owner: Human assigned responsibility for one’s feeding
Rider: Owner overstepping its bounds
Farrier: Disposable surrogate owner; useful for acting out aggression without compromising food supply
Trainer: Owner with mob connections
Veterinarian: Flightless albino vulture

Only Horse People:

1. Believe in an 11th commandment: inside leg to outside rein…
2. Know that all topical medications come in either indelible blue or neon yellow
3. Think nothing of eating a sandwich while mucking out a stall
4. Know why a thermometer has a yard of yarn attached to the end of it
5. Are banned from Laundromats
6. Fail to associate whips, chains and leather with sexual deviancy
7. Can magically lower their voices five octaves to bellow at a pawing horse
8. Will end relationships over their hobby
9. Cluck to their cars to help them up hills
10. Insure their horses for more than their cars
11. Know (and care) more about their horse’s nutrition than their own
12. Have no problem speaking of semen, abscesses and colic surgery at the dinner table
13. Have a smaller wardrobe than their horse…
14. Engage in a hobby that is more work than their day job
15. Know that a good ride is better than Zoloft any day

#4 #9 and #12 made me giggle. They come straight from my life. Which is your favorite?

Courtney-King-Dye-Medical-Fund Store at eBay

Lots of good stuff being auctioned off there, and sadly, not the rush of bids I hoped to see when I arrived. There are breeches, coats, lessons with Lendon Gray and Gunter Seidel, you name it, people have donated it.

Check it out. Money goes to a good cause. Though Courtney has medical insurance, I can tell you from personal experience that it doesn’t cover everything you need. Not even close. A catastrophic accident like hers can bankrupt you in a heartbeat. Let’s not let this happen. It would be nice to know that Courtney can concentrate on her recovery rather than worry about her future and finances. We can help!

The owner of the Etsy Shop coup has reported that she is trying to keep up with the demand for T-shirts that support Courtney King-Dye’s recovery from a recent fall.

courtesy www.etsy.com/shop/coup

So if you’ve been to the shop in search of a T-shirt and been disappointed to see the SOLD OUT sign, go back. Again and again if you have to. Because she’s making them as fast as she can.

Anna Wise, one of the first scientists to understand that science and spirituality can address the same concepts, and who developed the EEG technology to measure and describe the brainwave patterns that occur during meditation and intense, pure focus, has died.

I had the intense privilege to spend some time with her, and I was profoundly affected by it. The marriage of science and the mind, virtually embodied in one brilliant human being. That was Anna.

I know that Anna is now everywhere, and no longer limited by her body. May her brilliant, awakened mind gather and return again to further enlighten mankind.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am the song that will never end.
I am the love of family and friend.
I am the child who has come to rest
In the arms of the Father who knows him best.

When you see the sunset fair,
I am the scented evening air.
I am the joy of a task well done.
I am the glow of the setting sun.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!

~ Mary E. Frye ~